Extramarital Affairs

Why Do People Have Affairs

• The relationship or marriage is having problems and a partner sees an affair as a way of getting away from the problem.
  
  
• One partner has a higher sex drive than the other and seeks physical release elsewhere.
  
  
• There may be feelings of being in a rut or perhaps boredom is setting in so some can feel that having an extramarital affair will be the answer to the problem and add excitement to their life
  
  
• A man or woman can have an affair or one night stand to prove that they are still attractive to the opposite sex.
  
  
• A man or woman may want to feel more than being a wife, husband, mother, father, housewife or househusband and be seen as someone other than a cook, cleaner, wage provider, etc.
  
  
• Some have extramarital affairs because their partner has or they suspect their partner has had an affair. An affair may mean nothing more than a simple act of revenge.
  
  
• Extramarital affairs may be seen by some as an uncomplicated way to have more sex.
  
  
• Some partners like the excitement and risk associated with having extramarital affairs.
  
  
• It could be a cry for help, and way to get the attention of a partner in the hope that they will then pay him or her more attention in the future.
  
  
• Alcohol and illegal drugs are disinhibitors and reduce the morals of people who take them which could lead to them having an affair or one night stand when they would normally judge that it would be wrong or can normally resist the temptation.
  
  
• One partner may not be able to have sex perhaps through illness or disability and the other looks elsewhere for sexual fulfilment.
  
  
• It is an ego trip and they love the attention from the other person.
  
  

Consequences Of Having An Extramarital Affair

How To Tell If Someone Is Having An Affair

• He or she may suddenly be dressing smarter, improves their wardrobe, has bought new, perhaps sexy, underwear
  
  
• Personal grooming like shaving more frequently or applying make up or perfume more often
  
  
• Time away from the marital home may increase
  
  
• Out of hours work activities may increase
  
  
• The person having the affair may be wearing new jewellery or have other items that could be a gift from a new sexual partner
  
  
• Contraceptives like condoms or the oral pill could be found and not used in your relationship
  
  
• He or she starts watching their diet or exercises more to look fitter or improve their physique
  
  
• As a couple you start to have more or less sex. Some people who have an affair have an increased sex drive, or give their spouse more sex out of guilt, others want less sex because they are too tired or their sexual needs are met elsewhere
  
  
• A wedding ring is no longer worn
  
  
• Takes more pride and time over their personnel appearance
  
  
• He or she buys or you find a new and separate mobile telephone
  
  
• Works longer on the computer, has a new e-mail address or messenger details or changes or sets up a password
  
  
• You receive phone calls and the person making the phone call hangs up without speaking
  
  
• Seems preoccupied when at home
  
  
• Your friends may act oddly because they suspect you or your spouse is having an affair or have heard some gossip and do not know how to tell you
  
  
• Credit card bills for restaurants, florists and hotel rooms
  
  
• Has a new knowledge of sex or new sexual positions or techniques
  
  
• Starts to buy you gifts like flowers or chocolates out of guilt
  
  
• Items belonging to the children, such as toys or car seats, are removed from the car
  
  
• He or she knows someone or talks about somewhere you know you have never been together but he or she seems to think you have - he or she may have been there with someone else
  
  
• Calls you by another name
  
  
• Starts doing the laundry so that you do not smell the other person's aroma or perfume or aftershave on the clothes
  
  
• Takes less interest around the home or in the family
  
  
• Has new enthusiasm or a glow
  
  
• Unexplained scratches or bite mark, especially on the back or neck
  
  
• He or she may be tired all the time because lying and leading a double life is exhausting
  
  
• Makes excuses to leave the marital home
  
  
• Starts arguments so that he or she has an excuse to leave the home for a few hours or even overnight
  
  
• Puts weight on - he or she is eating with their mistress or new partner and having to eat at home to carry on the pretence of normal life
  
  
• Taking longer to come home from work, normal social activities or from shopping
  
  
• Visits their friends more often and may not be there if you call
  
  
• Works overtime but does not get paid for the extra hours
  
  
• Starts to spend more money
  
  
• Takes more cash out of the bank machine rather than pays by traceable switch or credit card when out with the other person
  
  
• Taste in music, radio station or television programmes change suddenly

What To Do If Someone Has An Affair

Should I Have An Affair

Agency Or Website That Helps People Have An Extramarital Affair